from January 18, 1996

and so at what point does a song become great? At what point does it transcend itself to become a work of art? The reason these questions are being posed is a result of the upcoming birthday (#2) on jan. 29 of “perfect ring”. At some point, and this was a gradual process, that song became a defining work of mine. It was with such trepidation that I brought that song to the bloodflowers’ attention. “oh, another song,” I thought. “they will hate learning it.” And not being sure the arrangement or form of the song. Should the first verse be repeated twice at the beginning and the final chorus twice at the end? At some point, an ending emerged and the song takes over the creator. The performer becomes a slave to the song. You try to beat a song into submission but just when you think you have it, there is an uprising from within the song itself such that the performer is usurped by a powerful preserce that the song becomes. There is an element of power from no knowable source inherent in great works be they paintings or movies or statues or songs or dances. Something in the expression of thepiece makes the performer a tool in the creation of… light? It is almost like the performer is a lightbulb and when performing lesser works, she still seems like a lightbulb and people recognize her for being a lightbulb. However, when the right piece is performed, when the electricity is just so, that performer becomes a conduit for breathtaking beauty and light. “I can see clearly now,” the audience would gasp.

What is that magical quality?

(NOTE: even at such an early time, my fascination with great art was evident. Without any schooling, I had already found dominant metaphors of illumination and divinity..)